Tootfinder

Book review: Everything To Play For
#Gaming

Lewis: Blame Bledsoe for hit that led to Brady era https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/46095827/book-lewis-blames-bledsoe-hit-ushered-brady-era

Book Review “The End” by Joel Wainwright
This book is unlike the majority of books I have reviewed here. It is a very serious, academic treatise. The reason I wanted to read it was not because I am a communist (I'm not) but because the blurb I got suggests that it "confronts the planetary climate crisis". I did my due diligence and flogged my way through the entire book - which was a bit like going back to university.

Book Review “The End” by Joel Wainwright
This book is unlike the majority of books I have reviewed here. It is a very serious, academic treatise. The reason I wanted to read it was not because I am a communist (I’m not) but because …

Also recently finished “The River We Remember” by William Kent Kreuger.
The post-war tranquility in a small town in rural Minnesota in 1958 is upended by prejudice and bigotry as a murder is investigated.
4/5 stars
⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/101160

The River We Remember
In 1958, a small Minnesota town is rocked by the murder…

🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #Roadhouse
Florry:
🎵 First It Was A Movie, Then It Was A Book
#Florry
https://florry.bandcamp.com/track/first-it-was-a-movie-then-it-was-a-book
https://open.spotify.com/track/0CO8FICjkvVDekOcarbvIR

One of my books is in here. Probably check for any of your professional (or less professional) writing and sign on:
https://mastodon.social/@Richard_Littler/115105862107138339

The eternal question in the minds of UK citizens:

edit_wikibooks: Wikipedia book edits (2010)
Two bipartite user-page networks extracted from Wikipedia, about books. A user connects to a page if that user edited that page. Edits (edges) are timestamped. Edge weights represent counts of the number of edits.
This network has 2504 nodes and 7105 edges.
Tags: Informational, Web graph, Multigraph, Timestamps

Australian Book Lovers
Great Australian Pods Podcast Directory: #GreatAusPods

I feel very undecided about the book I picked up: “Think Like a Monk” by Jay Shetty.
There’s a nagging thought in the back of my mind that the book might not be what I’m looking for. The confirmation bias kicked in immediately and within minutes it called out the following: “Three years after I moved to Mumbai, my teacher, Gauranga Das, told me he believed I would be of greater value and service if I left the ashram and shared what I’d learned with the world”. So these are the teachings of someone who studied for 3 years what others are practicing a life time and then was sent out to be a marketer.

Have I read Mein Kampf? Yes!
Is it trash? Also, Yes!
#Fascism

I just finished reading the second book of the #WayfarerSeries
Another heart warming book by Becky Chambers, looking forward to read the next two books of the series.

Can I even buy a book at O’Reilly or is this no longer a supported mode of engaging with a book?

Towards a Holistic and Automated Evaluation Framework for Multi-Level Comprehension of LLMs in Book-Length Contexts
Jiaqi Deng, Yuho Lee, Nicole Hee-Yeon Kim, Hyangsuk Min, Taewon Yun, Minjeong Ban, Kim Yul, Hwanjun Song
https://arxiv.org/abs/2508.19578

Towards a Holistic and Automated Evaluation Framework for Multi-Level Comprehension of LLMs in Book-Length Contexts
We introduce HAMLET, a holistic and automated framework for evaluating the long-context comprehension of large language models (LLMs). HAMLET structures source texts into a three-level key-fact hierarchy at root-, branch-, and leaf-levels, and employs query-focused summarization to evaluate how well models recall and faithfully represent information at each level. To validate the reliability of our fully automated pipeline, we conduct a systematic human study, showing that our automatic evaluat…

LGBTQIA Book History Bibliography by Alex Wingate: https://sharpweb.org/sharpnews/2025/08/22/lgbtqia-book-history-bibliography/
"The following collaborative bibliography compiles and celebrates book historical work about and for LGBTQIA communiti…

Just re-read the first chapter of a book I am probably not gonna finish writing.
11 years have passed, and oddly some of it feels more topical now.
https://stuff.davidaugust.com/avocado-katz-and-the-battle-for-mars/

Avocado Katz and the Battle for Mars
by David August

Thanks to a book recommendation by @… [1], I went on a tangent learning more about the absolutely fascinating history and workings of core memory (and core rope memory, its read-only version). Some of this also very interesting for #PermaComputing and …

It’s a bummer this bundle ends before my PyCon UK keynote (~mild spoiler~), but why don’t y’all get these 25 books on software architecture just in case?
(OF COURSE it has Architecture Patterns with Python)
https://www.humblebundle.com/books/software-archite…

Humble Tech Book Bundle: Software Architecture 2025 by O'Reilly
Pay what you want for the latest Humble Tech Bundle: Software Architecture 2025 and help support Code for America with your purchase!

A bit surreal to hear a personal friend on a major podcast. But if you missed Amy Butler Greenfield's amazing book, "A Perfect Red", listen to her on the National Gallery's podcast! (Also available audio-only, but you'd miss the visuals.)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2jEf3QH_ho

loved every counterintuitive twist in thomas gilbert's "how baseball happened," the weirdness of early #baseball set against the social/cultural worlds of 19th century #nyc/#brooklyn, a perfect complement to john thorn's "baseball in the garden of eden" & lucy sante's &quo…

Marsha P. Johnson has become an icon of gay, trans, and queer liberation,
and yet little is known about her life beyond her participation in the Stonewall Uprising of 1969 and the decades long controversy after her lifeless body was found floating in the Hudson River in 1992.
In "Marsha: The Joy and Defiance of Marsha P. Johnson",
Tourmaline, an award-winning Black trans artist, filmmaker, and activist who has dedicated her life to uplifting Marsha P. Johnson’s l…

What We Can Learn From the Defiant Life and Legacy of Marsha P. Johnson
Black trans artist, filmmaker, and activist Tourmaline discusses her new book about Marsha’s trailblazing life.

Slid the dust jacket off Nnedi Okorafor’s “Death of the Author” to reveal a full-color cover for “Rusted Robots.”
From what I know about the book (just starting it tonight), I really like this design choice.

Only until end of July: #Geospatial ebook sale at @…
Use coupon code: SUMMERSUN25
for your 10% discount on any e-book, including the #Spanish…

I love Mortal Engines and i love reading stories in that universe. If you like those perfect books you will also enjoy this. Not on the same level as the OG series.
#books #reading

A triptych on Starhawk, who developed some of the most poignantly insightful ideas in structural theories of power, among the many philosophers, sociologists, and psychologists who wrote about theories of power in the 20th century
Note that the second and third image come from the *same book*, in the first and second chapters
I…did not expect woo poetry on magic and sexuality in a book that's highly cited by writers on theories of power

Q&A: Rodney Benson, one of four authors of How Media Ownership Matters, on which ownership models for news lead to strong journalism and business outcomes (Dr. Anya Schiffrin/Columbia Journalism Review)
https://www.cjr.org/the-interview/rodney-b

Rodney Benson on the Value of Publicly Backed Journalism
A recent book suggests American media can learn from European ownership structures.

I really can't put Book of Hours down on #Steam.
Cultist Simulator is less of my jam because of the timers - and yet that's exactly what other people love more about it than Book of Hours.
Chill, mysterious exploratory gaming plus unlock puzzles plus a sound track that sounds like you're listening to Coraline the whole time. What's not to love?

In 'The vegetarian', by Han Kang, a bloody dream leads a young woman to stop eating meat. This leads to a series of social, personal and mental issues. Intense, and maybe difficult to understand without having a Korean background. A gripping story in three parts.
#book #goodread

Iran nearly succeeded in orchestrating assassination of Mike Pompeo in Europe in 2022, book reveals (Emily Davies/Washington Post)
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/06/27/trump-iran-pompeo-assassination/
http://www.memeorandum.com/250628/p1#a250628p1

edit_wikibooks: Wikipedia book edits (2010)
Two bipartite user-page networks extracted from Wikipedia, about books. A user connects to a page if that user edited that page. Edits (edges) are timestamped. Edge weights represent counts of the number of edits.
This network has 270 nodes and 323 edges.
Tags: Informational, Web graph, Multigraph, Timestamps

Last week, I finished a book that I really liked but the one I followed up with was a letdown so I reckoned I would finally read Elana Ferrante’s “My Brilliant Friend,” which everyone says is so great and it’s on my shelf anyway, bu then I found this old edition of GB Shaw plays and I’m reading that instead, Pygmalion first. It’s very funny — I laughed out loud in Act V. Also — spoiler alert! — it has a better ending than the 1964 film (which I love anyway!).

This has the fingerprints of Dog-E sabotage.
What is also bothersome is the way that agency spokespeople have so quickly become the kind of sycophantic courtiers that Jonathan Swift described on the floating island of Laputa in his book Gulliver's Travels.
"Sudden loss of key US satellite data could send hurricane forecasting back ‘decades’"

Finished “My Friends” by Fredrik Backman and adored it. It’s not a perfect book, as there are a few moments that seem a little too saccharine, but where it excels, it REALLY excels.
The story of a painting, the friends depicted within it, and their friendship that made it all possible. A love letter to art and friendship, contrasted with the neglect, abuse, and mourning they would need each other to overcome.
4.5 rounded up to 5/5 stars
⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

My Friends
"The world is full of miracles, but none greater than h…

If I hadn't had helpers with umbrellas I would have been stuck in the nearby lean-to reading a book about Kitsune legends of Japan -- here I am reading before the event took place, unfortunately the images of the lean-to I took got corrupted but I'll be back!
#photo #photography

"Against this backdrop of racist, imperial violence, people of all colours and religions and none have mobilised. While they may not have stopped the genocide, they have laid bare the hypocritical barefaced lies of the British political elite. Only this sort of solidarity and challenge to racism can stop the dystopic world of my book becoming a reality."
The UK is slipping into racist dystopia | Racism | Al Jazeera

The UK is slipping into racist dystopia
And only mass solidarity mobilisation can stop it.

Highly recommend this book. Great universe building and characters.
From: @…
https://wandering.shop/@annaleen/114932605661493563

Annalee Newitz 🍜 (@annaleen@wandering.shop)
Attached: 1 image This week, you can get the ebook of The Terraformers for just $2.99 wherever ebooks are sold -- including indie bookseller platform Bookshop.org, along with the usual places. If you can't wait for Automatic Noodle, this will tide you over!

Just finished "Dust" by Yvonne Adhiambo Owuor. A heavy but engrossing book, interwoven through a rich tapestry of Kenyan history. I learned a lot and was inspired to look up more, though that doesn't say much given my previous practically nonexistent knowledge of Kenyan history. Owuor's characters are complex and deeply interwoven, and her choices about what to reveal, when, and through whose voice, are immaculate. There is wisdom in this book, like Ajany's thought that we may each be born with a portion of madness to work through.
#AmReading

I wonder how many participants of the NATO summit earlier this week have ever read this book.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Psychology_of_Military_Incompetence?wprov=sfti1

On the Psychology of Military Incompetence - Wikipedia

Payday tomorrow. As well as now having to fund my son's train travel into sixth form college, pay into the College Fund (£75 - could be worse) and buy him some new clobber, I'm going to book tickets to see Eric Ravilious – Drawn To War, being screened in a pub in Pembridge as part of Flicks in the Sticks. The new furniture I'd like is going to have to wait but that's no great hardship.

Ich lese E-Books, also bin ich grün?! 📚🌿 Die Stiftung Warentest hat klare Zahlen vorgelegt: E-Books sind echte Klimaschützer! 📚✨ Bei der Produktion und Auslieferung gedruckter Bücher werden über fünf Jahre mehr als zehnmal so viele Treibhausgase freigesetzt wie bei E-Books – selbst wenn man die Herstellung der Reader mit einbezieht.
Zum Artikel:

I got a #review copy of Where The Wildflowers Grow by Terah Shelton Harris from #Netgalley. Here is what I thought: https://

Call for Papers: Religion and AI in Science Fiction and Horror
https://ift.tt/cJK4wve
Book Title: A (Holy?) Ghost in the Machine: Religion and Artificial Intelligence in Science-Fiction…
via Input 4 RELCFP

Call for Papers: Religion and AI in Science Fiction and Horror
Book Title: A (Holy?) Ghost in the Machine: Religion and Artificial Intelligence in Science-Fiction and Horror Editor: Gregory Stevenson, York University The genres of Science-Fiction and Horror ha…

( \(2^{nd}\) announcement)
The #Springer Problem Book for the Indiana College Mathematics Competition (2001-2023) is now available in a (slightly less expensive) softcover format! This book, edited by me, J. Gash, R. Gillman, and @… , can be used by stu…

The Indiana College Mathematics Competition (2001⁠–2023)
This book gathers problems based on over twenty years of the Indiana College Mathematics Competition, a contest for teams of undergraduates.

It was a long time since I read an entire fiction book in one day. Today’s bloody hot weather left me no choice.

Laggy #CommonplaceBook notes: https://lbj20.blogspot.com/2025/08/commonplace-book-climate-slop-defence.html on climate, slop, defence, and more

Commonplace book entries: climate, slop, defence
Those American candy gift shops, that one usually assumes are some sort of money laundering scheme, are in fact multilevel tax dodges .  Val...

More big names unveiled in Epstein’s ‘bawdy’ birthday book - Raw Story
https://www.rawstory.com/epstein-birthday-book/

More of this, please. https://me.dm/@funcrunch/114751288573182357

Christian Wilkins Out: Raiders Close The Book On Major Free Agency Miss https://raiderramble.com/2025/07/24/christian-wilkins-out-raiders-close-the-book-on-major-free-agency-miss/

And “Noor” by Nnedi Okorafor in which AO, a woman with some cybernetic implants resultant from a horrible accident as a child, goes on the run from authorities after a fight in which she defends herself from an attack by bigoted men who despise her for those “unnatural” implants.
As she flees into the Nigerian desert, she meets a nomadic cattleman, who is also in the run from the state for merely existing.

Noor
From Africanfuturist luminary Okorafor comes a new scie…

i reminded myself of an acronym i learned from a book i bought over 30 years ago
there was an amazing amount of _pnambic_ AI going on in the years before the launch of ChatGPT
i wonder how much of it still exists
eg i know there are two people employed as remote-operator drivers per google “driverless” car

Effective Asymptotics of Combinatorial Systems
Carine Pivoteau, Bruno Salvy
https://arxiv.org/abs/2508.20008 https://arxiv.org/pdf/2508.20008

Effective Asymptotics of Combinatorial Systems
Analytic combinatorics studies asymptotic properties of families of combinatorial objects using complex analysis on their generating functions. In their reference book on the subject, Flajolet and Sedgewick describe a general approach that allows one to derive precise asymptotic expansions starting from systems of combinatorial equations. In the situation where the combinatorial system involves only cartesian products and disjoint unions, the generating functions satisfy polynomial systems with…

Identifying Framing Practices in Visualization Design Through Practitioner Reflections
Prakash Shukla, Paul Parsons
https://arxiv.org/abs/2508.20383 https://

Identifying Framing Practices in Visualization Design Through Practitioner Reflections
Framing -- how designers define and reinterpret problems, shape narratives, and guide audience understanding -- is central to design practice. Yet in visualization research, framing has been examined mostly through its rhetorical and perceptual effects on audiences, leaving its role in the design process underexplored. This study addresses that gap by analyzing publicly available podcasts and book chapters in which over 80 professional visualization designers reflect on their work. We find that…

New book(s) day!
Picked up The Book Makers by Adam Smyth https://uk.bookshop.org/p/books/book-a-story-in-thirteen-extraordinary-lives-adam-smyth/7528005 thanks to a recommendation from Robin Sloan:

Guess what arrived in Switzerland today! This looks great, @…!
#retrocomputing #computinghistory

Comic book artist Ian Bertram on encouraging your inner artist https://thecreativeindependent.com/people/comic…

Comic book artist Ian Bertram on encouraging your inner artist – The Creative Independent
Comic book artist Ian Bertram discusses making time and space for creativity, finding an overall balance, and the difficulty of describing your own work.

New book published June 2025:
FRANK ZAPPA'S AMERICA
by Bradley Morgan
An analysis of modern-day white nationalism & Christian fascism in the US through the lens of Frank Zappa’s music during the 1980s.
Publishing by Louisiana State University Press.
https://lsupress.org/9780807183922…

Frank Zappa's America
From his early albums with the Mothers of Invention, Frank Zappa established a reputation as a musical genius who pushed the limits of culture throughout the...

For anyone who wants to self-host their catalog of book video game or movie collections, Koillection is a good open-source option.
It can also be installed using Docker, which can speed up the setup process.
I've only been using this tool for a couple of days, and it looks promising. The only thing that doesn't seem very intuitive at the moment is the scraping system, although its developer has commented on GitHub that they are working on it.

Democrats request copy of Epstein 'birthday book' that reportedly contains Trump poem (Lauren Gambino/The Guardian)
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/jul/25/democrats-epstein-birthday-book
http://www.memeorandum.com/250726/p27#a250726p27

Mere Mortals Book Reviews
Great Australian Pods Podcast Directory: #GreatAusPods

Underhållande artikel
Ultra-Processed Evidence - May Contain Lies https://maycontainlies.com/ultra-processed-evidence/

Poster No 2028: Auditory stimuli extend the temporal window of visual integration by modulating alpha oscillations https://doi.org/10.5281/zenodo.15641972 "auditory input resets alpha phase in the visual cortex";

Geez, I realized I hadn’t posted several recent books. There were a couple Nigerian science fiction books:
“Rosewater” by Tade Thompson. A mysterious alien biodome heals people when it opens up once a year, but Kaaro, who has some special abilities, begins to uncover some secrets that point to a more sinister purpose.
Loved the first half, but thought it fell off in the second half.
3/5 stars ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Rosewater (The Wormwood Trilogy, #1)
Tade Thompson's Rosewater is the start of an award-winn…

marvel_partnerships: Marvel character partnerships (2018)
A network of partnerships among characters in the Marvel comic book universe. Nodes are either heroes or villains, and edges represent partnerships between such characters. The partnership network was extracted from Wikipedia pages of these characters, which indicate partnership relations with other such pages.
This network has 350 nodes and 346 edges.
Tags: Social, Fictional, Unweighted

🧢 Will Bardenwerper on Baseball’s Betrayal of Its Minor League Roots
#sports

Will Bardenwerper on Baseball’s Betrayal of Its Minor League Roots
Journalist Will Bardenwerper joins co-hosts Whitney Terrell and V.V. Ganeshananthan to discuss his new book, Homestand: Small Town Baseball and the Fight for the Soul of America, which explores the…

Architectural #Patterns, The Pattern Language of #SoftwareArchitecture
https://github.com/denyspoltorak/metap…

I'm currently reading the second book of the DAEMON (German: Darknet, English: Freedom), a techno thriller from Daniel Suarez.
Pretty cool I think.
But what's even cooler: I just checked his homepage ( https://daniel-suarez.com/daemon10thsynopsis.html ) and saw a Ma…

Time for another "review". This one's hard. While the book was quite interesting, it required me to be quite open-minded. Still, I think it's worth mentioning:
Robert Wright — Nonzero: The Logic of Human Destiny
The book basically focused on a thesis that both biological evolution and cultural evolution are a thing, they are directional and this directionality can be explained together using game theory — as eventually leading to more non-zero sum games.
It consists of three chapters. The first one is is focused on the history of civilization. It features many examples from different parts of the world, which makes it quite interesting. The author argues that the culture inevitably is evolving as information processing techniques improve — from writing to the Internet.
The second chapter is focused on biological evolution. Now, the argument is that it's not quite random, but actually directed towards greater complexity — eventually leading to the development of highly intelligent species, and a civilization.
The third chapter is quite speculative and metaphysical, and I'm just going to skip it.
The book is full of optimism. Capitalism creates freedom — because people are more productive when they're working for their own gain, so the free market eliminates slavery. Globalisation creates networks of interdependence that make wars uneconomic. Increased contacts between different cultures makes people more tolerant. And eventually, the humanity may be able to unite facing a common "external" enemy — the climate change.
What can I say? The examples are quite interesting, the whole theory seems self-consistent. Still, I repeatedly looked at the publication date (it's 1999), and wondered if author would write the same thing today (yes, I know I can search for his current opinions).
#books #bookstodon @…

Retrieval Enhanced Feedback via In-context Neural Error-book
Jongyeop Hyun, Bumsoo Kim
https://arxiv.org/abs/2508.16313 https://arxiv.org/pdf/2508.16313

Retrieval Enhanced Feedback via In-context Neural Error-book
Recent advancements in Large Language Models (LLMs) have significantly improved reasoning capabilities, with in-context learning (ICL) emerging as a key technique for adaptation without retraining. While previous works have focused on leveraging correct examples, recent research highlights the importance of learning from errors to enhance performance. However, existing methods lack a structured framework for analyzing and mitigating errors, particularly in Multimodal Large Language Models (MLLM…

I recently saw a news story (CHEK News, Victoria, Porter Air) about a couple denied boarding because they could not produce the credit card used to book the flight.
According to experts, this was illegal in Canadian law. The airline's “tariff" — the actual contract between air carrier and passenger — had no such requirement.
The Canadian Transportation Agency lists the tariffs for 116 airlines. Might be worth having one literally in your back pocket when you fly.
https://otc-cta.gc.ca/eng/air-carrier-tariffs-posted-websites

"Dawn of War 4": Macher von "Book of Unwritten Tales" entwickeln Strategiespiel
Von knuffigen Point&Click-Adventures zu "Warhammer 40k": Das nächste "Dawn of War" entsteht in Bremen bei King Art. Es spielt sich schon jetzt hervorragend.

Call for Papers: Religious Emergence and The Sacred in Legends of Zelda
https://ift.tt/s0tzLUf
Volume Editor: Michael Barros This book will explore how religion and the sacred emerge from within…
via Input 4 RELCFP

Call for Papers: Religious Emergence and The Sacred in Legends of Zelda
Volume Editor: Michael Barros This book will explore how religion and the sacred emerge from within the structure and narrative of The Legend of Zelda series, one of the most influential …

🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #DriveTime
Book of Love:
🎵 Modigliani (Lost in Your Eyes)
#BookofLove
https://cursesforever.bandcamp.com/track/book-of-love-modigliani-lost-in-your-eyes-i-dream-of-jeanne-mix
https://open.spotify.com/track/53yTfRNAwCC7aLGaKlbysJ

How popular media gets love wrong
Okay, so what exactly are the details of the "engineered" model of love from my previous post? I'll try to summarize my thoughts and the experiences they're built on.
1. "Love" can be be thought of like a mechanism that's built by two (or more) people. In this case, no single person can build the thing alone, to work it needs contributions from multiple people (I suppose self-love might be an exception to that). In any case, the builders can intentionally choose how they build (and maintain) the mechanism, they can build it differently to suit their particular needs/wants, and they will need to maintain and repair it over time to keep it running. It may need winding, or fuel, or charging plus oil changes and bolt-tightening, etc.
2. Any two (or more) people can choose to start building love between them at any time. No need to "find your soulmate" or "wait for the right person." Now the caveat is that the mechanism is difficult to build and requires lots of cooperation, so there might indeed be "wrong people" to try to build love with. People in general might experience more failures than successes. The key component is slowly-escalating shared commitment to the project, which is negotiated between the partners so that neither one feels like they've been left to do all the work themselves. Since it's a big scary project though, it's very easy to decide it's too hard and give up, and so the builders need to encourage each other and pace themselves. The project can only succeed if there's mutual commitment, and that will certainly require compromise (sometimes even sacrifice, though not always). If the mechanism works well, the benefits (companionship; encouragement; praise; loving sex; hugs; etc.) will be well worth the compromises you make to build it, but this isn't always the case.
3. The mechanism is prone to falling apart if not maintained. In my view, the "fire" and "appeal" models of love don't adequately convey the need for this maintenance and lead to a lot of under-maintained relationships many of which fall apart. You'll need to do things together that make you happy, do things that make your partner happy (in some cases even if they annoy you, but never in a transactional or box-checking way), spend time with shared attention, spend time alone and/or apart, reassure each other through words (or deeds) of mutual beliefs (especially your continued commitment to the relationship), do things that comfort and/or excite each other physically (anywhere from hugs to hand-holding to sex) and probably other things I'm not thinking of. Not *every* relationship needs *all* of these maintenance techniques, but I think most will need most. Note especially that patriarchy teaches men that they don't need to bother with any of this, which harms primarily their romantic partners but secondarily them as their relationships fail due to their own (cultivated-by-patriarchy) incompetence. If a relationship evolves to a point where one person is doing all the maintenance (& improvement) work, it's been bent into a shape that no longer really qualifies as "love" in my book, and that's super unhealthy.
4. The key things to negotiate when trying to build a new love are first, how to work together in the first place, and how to be comfortable around each others' habits (or how to change those habits). Second, what level of commitment you have right now, and what how/when you want to increase that commitment. Additionally, I think it's worth checking in about what you're each putting into and getting out of the relationship, to ensure that it continues to be positive for all participants. To build a successful relationship, you need to be able to incrementally increase the level of commitment to one that you're both comfortable staying at long-term, while ensuring that for both partners, the relationship is both a net benefit and has manageable costs (those two things are not the same). Obviously it's not easy to actually have conversations about these things (congratulations if you can just talk about this stuff) because there's a huge fear of hearing an answer that you don't want to hear. I think the range of discouraging answers which actually spell doom for a relationship is smaller than people think and there's usually a reasonable "shoulder" you can fall into where things aren't on a good trajectory but could be brought back into one, but even so these conversations are scary. Still, I think only having honest conversations about these things when you're angry at each other is not a good plan. You can also try to communicate some of these things via non-conversational means, if that feels safer, and at least being aware that these are the objectives you're pursuing is probably helpful.
I'll post two more replies here about my own experiences that led me to this mental model and trying to distill this into advice, although it will take me a moment to get to those.
#relationships #love

game_thrones: Game of Thrones coappearances
Network of coappearances of characters in the Game of Thrones series, by George R. R. Martin, and in particular coappearances in the book "A Storm of Swords." Nodes are unique characters, and edges are weighted by the number of times the two characters' names appeared within 15 words of each other in the text.
This network has 107 nodes and 352 edges.
Tags: Social, Fictional, Weighted

Pleased to announce that the third edition of my PL book, PLAI, is finally available on paper! Same price as it's been for 20 years (-:. Also made it available on Kindle EPUB, and a few other options. (Always free options, of course.) Enjoy!
https://www.plai.org/

Eagles Super Bowl champion Jalen Hurts to release children's book titled 'Better Than A Touchdown'

https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/eagles-

game_thrones: Game of Thrones coappearances
Network of coappearances of characters in the Game of Thrones series, by George R. R. Martin, and in particular coappearances in the book "A Storm of Swords." Nodes are unique characters, and edges are weighted by the number of times the two characters' names appeared within 15 words of each other in the text.
This network has 107 nodes and 352 edges.
Tags: Social, Fictional, Weighted

Call for Papers: Religious Emergence and The Sacred in Legends of Zelda
https://ift.tt/YdRuc1b
Volume Editor: Michael Barros This book will explore how religion and the sacred emerge from within…
via Input 4 RELCFP

Call for Papers: Religious Emergence and The Sacred in Legends of Zelda
Volume Editor: Michael Barros This book will explore how religion and the sacred emerge from within the structure and narrative of The Legend of Zelda series, one of the most influential …

Book Review “The End” by Joel Wainwright

Scoop: Dems think they can get ahold of Epstein's birthday book (Andrew Solender/Axios)
https://www.axios.com/2025/07/25/jeffrey-epstein-birthday-book-democrats-khanna
http://www.memeorandum.com/250725/p105#a250725p105

Amazon bringt etwas günstigeren Kindle Colorsoft mit leichten Abstrichen
Amazon macht aus dem Kindle Colorsoft eine Serie. Jetzt gibt es den farbigen E-Book-Reader auch günstiger mit weniger Speicher sowie ein Modell für Kinder.

"The Meanings of a Publication in the Humanities: Meaning, text, and authorship in critical perspective" by
Marcel Knöchelmann: #publications

from my link log —
The (unfinished) partial differential equation coffee table book.
https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/pdectb.html
saved 2025-07-17

Finished the short story, “The Answer is No” by Fredrik Backman, the story of a man without any attachments who just wants to be left alone to eat pad thai & play video games. The neighbors in his apartment keep intruding upon his privacy in ludicrously farcical ways.
Great writer & some great moments, but the whole thing felt like a collection of tropes. Had there been a laugh track on the audiobook, I’d not have been surprised.
3/5 stars ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

The Answer Is No
In a hilarious short story from New York Times bestsell…

Gotta admit… there's nothing quite like the feel of holding a paper copy of your book in your hands. (First time since 2007, haven't done new printing version since.) And color print-on-demand has gotten remarkably affordable, so price unchanged (just drop royalty a bit).

Call for Papers: Religion and AI in Science Fiction and Horror
https://ift.tt/KxFGOHC
Book Title: A (Holy?) Ghost in the Machine: Religion and Artificial Intelligence in Science-Fiction…
via Input 4 RELCFP

Call for Papers: Religion and AI in Science Fiction and Horror
Book Title: A (Holy?) Ghost in the Machine: Religion and Artificial Intelligence in Science-Fiction and Horror Editor: Gregory Stevenson, York University The genres of Science-Fiction and Horror ha…

edit_wikibooks: Wikipedia book edits (2010)
Two bipartite user-page networks extracted from Wikipedia, about books. A user connects to a page if that user edited that page. Edits (edges) are timestamped. Edge weights represent counts of the number of edits.
This network has 960 nodes and 1308 edges.
Tags: Informational, Web graph, Multigraph, Timestamps

Epstein's Estate Includes Book Said to Have Note From Trump, a Lawyer Says (Matthew Goldstein/New York Times)
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/us/politics/epstein-trump-birthday-book.html?unlocked_article_code=1.Y08.bv8B.LbZkvbptUGD-&smid=url-share
http://www.memeorandum.com/250724/p139#a250724p139

Whoever created this, you just sprinkled a little extra rainbow on my Friday evening! 🌈✨
#Bisexual #Pansexual #LGBTQIA

Open access book: Shopping with Allah: Muslim pilgrimage, gender and consumption in a globalized world
https://ift.tt/c3gju87
Call for Chapter Submissions: New Perspectives in Africana Studies Call for Chapter…
via Input 4 RELCFP

Trump's Name Is on Contributor List for Epstein Birthday Book (New York Times)
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/us/politics/trump-epstein-birthday-book.html?unlocked_article_code=1.ZE8.Pl-Y.-bXmQFyY6nlL&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
http://www.memeorandum.com/250724/p147#a250724p147

1/ Something a bit unusual and fun: I read a travel book *after* returning from #Italy25. This is a book first written in 1913; I had the 1923 edition. It was tough going to read before I left, because (as the title suggests), it's really a tour guide of a book. #BookReview ↵

edit_wikibooks: Wikipedia book edits (2010)
Two bipartite user-page networks extracted from Wikipedia, about books. A user connects to a page if that user edited that page. Edits (edges) are timestamped. Edge weights represent counts of the number of edits.
This network has 2155 nodes and 3748 edges.
Tags: Informational, Web graph, Multigraph, Timestamps

Open access book: Shopping with Allah: Muslim pilgrimage, gender and consumption in a globalized world https://networks.h-net.org/group/announcements/20120494/open-access-book-shopping-allah-muslim-pilgrimage-gender-and

bookcrossing: BookCrossing ratings (2005)
Two bipartite networks representing people and the books they have interacted with, from the BookCrossing website. Nodes represent users and books, and an edge connects a user to a book they have interacted with. The file book_implicit is unweighted; edge weights in book_ratings give the rating a user assigned to a book.
This network has 445801 nodes and 1149739 edges.
Tags: Economic, Preferences, Unweighted, Weighted

bookcrossing: BookCrossing ratings (2005)
Two bipartite networks representing people and the books they have interacted with, from the BookCrossing website. Nodes represent users and books, and an edge connects a user to a book they have interacted with. The file book_implicit is unweighted; edge weights in book_ratings give the rating a user assigned to a book.
This network has 445801 nodes and 1149739 edges.
Tags: Economic, Preferences, Unweighted, Weighted

marvel_partnerships: Marvel character partnerships (2018)
A network of partnerships among characters in the Marvel comic book universe. Nodes are either heroes or villains, and edges represent partnerships between such characters. The partnership network was extracted from Wikipedia pages of these characters, which indicate partnership relations with other such pages.
This network has 350 nodes and 346 edges.
Tags: Social, Fictional, Unweighted