Health Stuff

Recovered somewhat from whatever that weird fit was at the end of last year.

NHS still has me on some sort of list I think, appointment might turn up next year. Last contact with them they were suggesting maybe November.
But the private treatment gave me the
MRI which
showed nothing weird and post-fit symptoms have been reducing.
Experimented with eating meat to see if that helped.
Tried eating meat for a month to see if it reduced the post-fit symptoms. Maybe it did? Tried vegetarian again and maybe it got worse?
Hard to tell with intermittent symptoms and a terrible memory.
Decided it's more likely to do good than harm (to me, entirely harm to the animals obviously), and eat meat till the end of the year.
While I'm better, I don't really feel fully recovered enough to want to change things so more meat next year I think.
One of those symptoms is that booze tolerance dropped to like zero. Very rarely had more than four pints in a day this year and very rarely more than one night a
week.
Much high number than the target there really.
Tripped over a guy-rope and fell onto the wrist.
Did two days of the festival and the drive home thinking it almost certainly wasn't broken and only confirmed it was when I got home and the hospital put it in a cast.

After the whole Adam Something "dating advice for leftist men" thing, I realized I should probably write something about that. I didn't, but I realized I should. Here I am sort of getting around to it.
I had a friend call me an "elder" at one point. I was like 35 at that time, but like... a lot of old leftists are just dead or in prison, so we take what we can get I guess. Being also an elder in the sense that I'm an elder millennial, who is also a parent and married for almost 10 years and all that, I guess I'm technically qualified.
So here it is, dating advice for (straight cis) leftist men:
1. Don't.
That's it, actually. That's the whole thing. Let me explain a bit.
First of all, this is dating advice for neuroatypical folks. We're way overrepresented in both extremes because this system wasn't built for us. And that's who is *the most* confused by all the relationship stuff, and most likely to try to apply all this masculinity/manosphere bullshit. I'm also talking a bit from experience here, as a neruo-spicy trying to "figure out" how to date within a paradigm entirely built around neurotypicals and their relationships. It's garbage. Throw it out. There's nothing worth saving.
His video had some line comparing not having sex to your house being on fire. I'm not gonna bother to quote it because I'm busy with actual life. But like, that's exactly what I'm talking about. I recognize that and it's horribly destructive. Men who buy in to patriarchy actually believe this, because those men value themselves based on (hetro) sex. Yeah, if you think you're worthless because you aren't "getting laid" then yeah, you're gonna feel like that's an emergency.
"Dating" as a paradigm turns humans into roles. It dehumanizes us all, and thus makes human connection much harder. It is a game that, like thermonuclear war, can only be won by not playing.
When you abandon "dating" and just act like a human, everything starts to be easier. There's no such thing as being "friend zoned" because you're just friends. Sometimes friendships become other things, sometimes they don't. It doesn't actually matter, because if you're actually there for friendship then you don't *need* anything else.
My grandma, at 98 I think, gave me some advice. My grandparents always got along well, and were married for enough decades that I listened really closely. She told me I should just do things I loved to do and everything else would work itself out.
And it kind of did.
I understand the fear, the idea that you'll die alone. I get that. I get the loneliness. It all hits a lot harder when you have ADHD emotions and past trauma. I get that. But that fear is self-manifesting. When you build your confidence, when you don't *need* to be "in a relationship," you have more room to actually build relationships. For me, dating was dehumanizing. When I abandoned that, I was able to actually be a good partner, and I was able to find my partner.
I would advise against marriage as well, but we did get married for legal reasons. It can still be hard to maintain that, to see each other as people rather than roles. That becomes extra hard as parents. But the times that we cut through that are the times we're closest. Those are the times when it becomes easier to remember that we're both humans and all human relationships need tending.
Roles don't need to be tended because they are classifications. Classifications are static. But relationships between humans are not. Humans are messy and chaotic. Humans have all kinds of complex needs and desires.
So yeah, don't date. Just be a human and see what happens. Maybe google "relationship anarchy" and see where it takes you.
If you have ADHD, it can be especially useful to understand that relationships with neurotypical folks can be especially difficult. Assume you're incompatible with 90% of the population as your baseline, and you'll start to understand why the standard "dating" thing has made you feel so alienated and miserable.
Neurotypical folks generally have no idea that atypicality exists, much less how it impacts relationships. Having to conform to a neurotypical relationship just adds additional mental strain unless you find someone (really special) who can do at least some of the work.
The ADHD thing was especially important for me. There were so many things I was told to do in specific ways by neurotypicals that never worked for me. Their advice always made me feel like a failure. When I was finally diagnosed, I realized they were just giving advice for the wrong type of brain. It was advice I could never use. Basically all dating advice I ever got fell into this same category.
That's my braindump. Maybe I'll develop it more in the future, but I'm busy so maybe not. I hope it helps someone who is struggling like I was.

Nothing says an overvalued Nvidia better than a random ad for a $5000 nothingburger prebuilt PC. Do you know how much fresh air that kind of money could buy you? Unlimited supplies. These bozos are on their way to make reading books fun again. Hell, at some point you would even be able to afford a cheap Chinese TV set to see them properly tarred and feathered.

Series B, Episode 03 - Weapon
FEN: You're a sad man, Travis. Life must have reverence.
TRAVIS: Now. I want the other one.
FEN: No.
TRAVIS: Get the other one.
FEN: You know better than this.
TRAVIS: Do I?
https://blake.torpidity.net/m/203/5 B7B3

Growing up in the 80s, my mom was a board member of a 2nd-wave feminist bookshop in Atlanta, so I thought all bookstores were queer-friendly, feminist spaces
As the funny fad of the Internet started to take off, I naturally assumed — for literally months, in the early 90s — that "Amazon" was an online lesbian separatist bookstore in the vein of the Whole Earth Catalog.
In retrospect, my imagined reality was SO MUCH BETTER than what we wound up with

Joseph P. Sweatpants 😉 writes:
Ok Machineheads! I hope it's ok to call ourselves that!?! Maybe "loose screws" is better??? Haha. Hey all you Loose Screws, the first This Machine was a huge success!! The New Deal Cafe wants us back!! Basically, we're going to roll every two months. The next This Machine open mic for works of political protest will be Sunday, April 12, sign-ups 1230p, music 1-4p. Watch the news, work on your songs, poems, jokes, etc.

De Nederlandsche Bank waarschuwt voor big tech, maar draait zelf op Microsoft - Follow the Money -
https://www.ftm.nl/artikelen/nederlandsche-bank-waarschuwt-voor-bigtech-microsoft
Archive link https://archive.ph/p3HuI
What the .... 🙈🙈
Maar goed ... Alles draait toch om de MS cloud, dus wat maakt t uit...
... Nou in zoverre dat DNB medewerkers niet alleen over NLse data en ideeën zullen beschikken, maar ongetwijfeld ook over data en documenten van collega centrale banken in andere landen die misschien wel beter beveiligd zijn.
(Via @… )

VRCX is a way better tool than I ever imagined. Back when I heard about it for the first time, it just sounded like one of those lowkey stalker tools. But it's actually so good. Being able to see things like when I met a person and where, how much time we've been together, etc. is really helpful. I often struggle remembering stuff like this and VRCX gives me just the right amount of context I need to remember.

Series A, Episode 02 - Space Fall
DAINER: Now, that's better.
VILA: Not bad, is it, eh? One for you -
NOVA: [To Blake] How will we know when he's made it?
BLAKE: The lights on the scanner - when that goes off we're on our way.
VILA: - one for me.
https://blake.torpidity.net/m/102/259