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> PHP Fatal error: Uncaught DivisionByZeroError: Division by zero
🤦‍♂️
#PHP #Serendipity

Updating a small project to the latest and greatest PHPStan and PHP versions:
#PHP #PHPStan

On empty return values. #PHP
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/empty-return-values

Are you a #PHP developer and you want to know how to work with #Al #coding tools? 🧑‍🏫
Here is the deal:
You message Jochen (not me!) – he has a video call and he gives you a task for an enha…

Some thoughts on the proposed #PHP Generics RFC.
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/erased-php-generics-2026

Avoid N 1 queries when validating array inputs in #php #Laravel ☝️
Instead of running `exists` per item, preload your data once and validate against it ✅
Cleaner code, better performance ⚡

Just had an intro call with @…'s new Executive Director, @….
I'm confident the Foundation is in good hands.
#PHP

I'm finally looking at the other sessions at #PHPTek next week, and damn, almost every time slot has more than one session I really want to go to.
Damn you, PHP Tek team! Well done.
#php

php -S localhost:8000 -t .
HOLY CRAP!?! How have I never known that PHP has a built-in web server for development? How long has this been thing? (Rhetorical question as I'm about to look it up, just stating for emphasis on my surprise to have just found this option.)
#PHP

Full circle happening to my developer career right now, friends!
#Swift now has a disambiguating PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM! (and no, I did not look up how to spell that; it is burned into my mind from #PHP 25 years ago)

About to run InfectionPHP on this PHPUnit testsuite... 😱
#InfectionPHP #PHP #PHPUnit

Hey #php developers out there 👀 👋
What tools do you use to make your #ai write "good" code? 😏
#phpstan,

Has anyone else seen this "No space left on device" on GitHub Actions come up recently?
#GitHub #PHP #CI

RE: #php

🔍 #PHPFTS: a self-contained full-text search engine in pure #PHP — no extensions, no dependencies, just files. Trigram indexing, BM25 IDF scoring, filters & typo-tolerant matching. Runs on any PHP 8.1 shared host.

Using #PSR-3 placeholders properly in PHP (and other awesome alliterations).
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/psr-3-properly

🔌 Non-blocking I/O for regular #PHP functions. fread, fwrite, file_get_contents, ob_start, curl, #MySQL, and #PostgreSQL now work asynchronously without extra effort.
🖥️ Built-in TrueAsync S…

Functional programming isn't just for Haskell developers. It's for #PHP developers, too. "Thinking Functionally in PHP" is available from LeanPub.
https://leanpub.com/thinking-functiona

Thinking Functionally in PHP
Functional programming in PHP 7.4, with a side of category theory and monads accessible to everyone.

⚡ #TrueAsync is an experimental library bringing true asynchronous programming to #PHP — coroutines, async/await, and non-blocking I/O built into the language core. Write high-performance concurrent applications with clean, readable code and minimal changes.

Watching Alexandre Daubois talk about PHP runtime vulnerabilities at #phptek

We need to have a talk #PHP, this is not supposed to happen when I do cool cutting-edge things:

Take the JetBrains developer survey 2026! (Use the link below so I get referral credit. :-) )
https://surveys.jetbrains.com/s3/developer-ecosystem-survey-2026-sh?pcode=219595885222191163

Just asked #Qwen 3.6 Plus what the current versions of #PHP and #Laravel are… it confidently said PHP 8.5 and Laravel 13 😄
I was like “wait, what?!” and asked again. Turns out it just extrapolat…

What the actual fuck!:
#protobuf #php

Null is problematic, but why? Let's see why, and let that guide us to new alternatives. #PHP
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/much-ado-about-null

When should you use #PHP Enums, and when shouldn't you?
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/on-the-use-of-enums

Bypassing #PHP visibility controls. Please don't do this often.
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/phptricks-access-control-bypass

📱 #React 19 frontend with #TypeScript, fuzzy search across keyboard layouts, #PHP 8.4 with 40 API endpoints. 100% free &

After an unfortunate finger slip, I briefly tried to call the arse_url() function in PHP.
Now I kinda want to write an RFC to add it..
#PHP #Silliness #Programming

🏗️ Composer integration out of the box: PSR-4, Classmap & autoload_files. Only classes your autoloader actually knows appear in completion.
🌀 Full #Laravel Eloquent support: Relationships, Scopes, Accessors, Casts & Builder chains – no Larastan or ide-helper needed.
📦 JetBrains #PHP

Let's be controversial: In modern #PHP, you should never type-hint an array.
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/array-type-hint

📄 #Parsel — an open-source #PHP document parser for #PDF, Office docs & images. Local processing, no external service. Extract text, structured data, coordinates & screenshots. Requires

Gah! Fucking #PHP arrays...

Here is my résumé when it comes to using #GLM 5.1 for refactoring a large #php #laravel code based on #sonarqube

Using #PSR-3 placeholders properly in PHP (and other awesome alliterations).
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/psr-3-properly

🚀 #Laravel now speaks #ClickHouse! laravel-clickhouse brings Eloquent, Query Builder & Schema Builder to the world's fastest OLAP database — familiar API, zero friction. #PHP

Let's be controversial: In modern #PHP, you should never type-hint an array.
https://www.garfieldtech.com/blog/array-type-hint

You can't stop the evolution... 🦋
#phpunit ➡️ #pest ➡️ #testo

It's always neat to be in a conference talk where someone is talking about #PHP features I helped make happen.
#PHPTek

The best post-conference-speaking feedback I can get is "I changed how I did things because of your talk."
Yep, I did get that after #PHPTek this week. Victory!
I'm so glad people found my sessions helpful.
#php

Reminder: your #ai #coding agent needs a lot of guardrails; otherwise, it generates a lot of crap, even opus... 😞
Fixing these errors at the end of the day takes forever.
It's better to run your linters and tests after every change...

#Idempotency: What, Why & How — deep dive into safe retries in #Laravel
🔁 #PHP #API

#FilaTeams - Team Management #Plugin for #Filament 5 #PHP

#AppDevPanel - Universal #PHP Debug Panel for #Symfony, #Laravel,

#PHPantom – ultra-fast #PHP Language Server written in #Rust 🦀 #LSP

#DelegatedTypes in #Laravel — Smarter Alternative to STI #PHP #Eloquent