
2025-07-21 07:26:13
More or less true. Though I'd argue that even the height and chin requirement is an overstatement..
It really is mostly about personality, friendliness and manners, not appearance.
#love
More or less true. Though I'd argue that even the height and chin requirement is an overstatement..
It really is mostly about personality, friendliness and manners, not appearance.
#love
New #Pixelfed post:
#GenderFluid
I'm reading Witch Hat Atelier right now (checked out of my local library) and it's top-notch amazing, including the plot, world-building, ethics, character designs, and of course three staggering artistic quality, both in raw illustration quality and artful compositions. It's not shy with playing with the manga form either, with lots of stunning unique panels and active gutters. I also just realized the "shounen manga for girls" formula I've been looking for (which is a formulation that's nearly as important for boys to have access to as girls). But I also really love the humor, including ridiculous puns that are often well-translated. In this scene, the main character Coco has forgotten she's using a mist form spell and ends up blowing away her mist-form body even as age rushes into a chaotic situation, leading to this pun.
#AmReading
🇺🇦 Auf radioeins läuft...
My Morning Jacket:
🎵 I Can Hear Your Love
#NowPlaying #MyMorningJacket
https://mmorningjacket.bandcamp.com/track/i-can-hear-your-love
https://open.spotify.com/track/6irjehaRKilu5g6XmbWF6J
Yes, I’m being a corporate shill tonight (I know, corporations will never love me) so I came out to the first In-N-Out opening in my home state of Washington.
Drive through line is 5 hours, dine-in 2.
It’s crazy. Even I don’t really think it’s worth *that* long of a wait. But the sunken cost fallacy is real.
I love staring the posts but generally if you tell me people unsubscribing from a service caused the stock price to go down I'm generally pretty skeptical. Cool if true but hard to prove and there is just never that many unsubscribing, sadly.
"I built a #QRcode with my bare hands to see how it works" https://youtu.be/w5ebcowAJD8
– about the development and functioning of
This is one of the most beautiful essays I’ve read all year.
“But while I've always suspected that AI is about a denial of death, in the aftermath of the traumatic and unexpected arrival of the Real, I feel this even more deeply. AI promises an illusion of steady continuity in a world full of unexpected redirection. Nothing shatters that illusion of perpetuity like the sudden death of someone you love.”
Wow wow wow wow. I’m crying in public reading it and couldn’t care less. https://mastodon.social/@antisomniac/114892553894128252
I've moved on from re-binging "The Last Kingdom" to re-binging "Vikings."
I love historical fiction movies but at some point the forever-burning torches and ubiquitous candles start to bother me. The trouble is that cold darkness doesn't film well.
@… I think we are on the same page. 😄
And I bet you’d love Men At Arms.
Just had an idea that I'll throw out to the universe and see if anyone wants to pick it up. An app like #Tea, but for shitty bosses. I'd love to blacklist some real assholes.
I thought suffering kept things interesting. How funny
that I called it love and the whole time it was pain.
--Ada Limón,
from the poem "Calling Things What They Are",
from the book "The Hurting Kind"
#Poetry
@… I'd love to have the URI or an URI of an archived version. And no, I deleted my dead-blue-bird-account an Musk-era ago so I can't search in the dead-blue-bird-thing anymore.
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #VarietyMix
Spoon:
🎵 Guess I'm Fallin in Love
#Spoon
https://spoontheband.bandcamp.com/track/guess-im-fallin-in-love
https://open.spotify.com/track/6NkeAbY0dQThFJ1SV3RoOZ
Patriots rookie TreVeyon Henderson downplays preseason buzz: 'I know that love turns into hate'
https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/patriot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNk-AqNFd1E
i rarely watch yt vids anymore this is the first one in ages cuz i love this guy tap in
But that’s kinda how I got here. https://mastodon.online/@danirabbit/114886743752674598
I have a definite love-hate relationship with vulkan-hpp. Not using raw C vulkan calls is super nice...
But sudden build failures with no warning due to them making breaking changes to function return types? Not so nice. They seem to feel they can make breaking changes freely at any time and don't do a great job of documenting said changes.
Man I love the GOV.UK team sometimes https://gds.blog.gov.uk/2013/07/25/faqs-why-we-dont-have-them/
Livestreams are always fun, and I love engaging with the folks who show up, but there’s also the mental crash afterwards where my brain turns to mush.
It’s not as bad as it used to be, but efficiency drops are noticeable.
Still worth it to talk and have fun with the community.
I love being online when @… is online.
I watch the toots, and boosts, and favourites roll in live.
Its like people watching, but cyber. cyber people watching.
I am really enjoying these crisp autumn days here in #Vermont ! The cool mornings… the pleasant afternoons and evenings… it’s the perfect example of how much I love late September and early October!!
Wait… what’s that you say??? I need to check the calendar?
(checks calendar)
Ummmm… WHAT is going on??
“Therefore, because baby loves baby, baby must be me.”
https://blog.jle.im/entry/the-baby-paradox-in-haskell.html
I love TAC and the refurbished and renamed Wood-Mico Theatre has reopened as a more accessible space (finally).
Tuggeranong Arts Centre scores biggest upgrade in nearly 30 years | Region Canberra
https://region.com.au/tuggeranong-arts-cent…
Reality check. A reminder for all us geeks.
With all Gentoo, Nix, Slackware, FreeBSD shizzle (and I love it) I can tell you nothing beats the ease and completeness of Linux Mint.
Just installed LMDE 7 beta and it's amazing.
Any day of the week us geeks have to recommend this, once it is out of beta, to newcomers in Linux.
#linuxmint
Fake Fruit is so good.
The high quality sound production of Tiny Desk really shows the band's talent too. I just love this band so much.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxytIk4W7wo&t=179s
Fuck censorship!
Fuck Trump and all his pedo friends!
I still like John Olliver more, but it's sad seeing Stephen Colbert go.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIZegLAvK8o
Sonnet 076 - LXXVI
Why is my verse so barren of new pride,
So far from variation or quick change?
Why with the time do I not glance aside
To new-found methods, and to compounds strange?
Why write I still all one, ever the same,
And keep invention in a noted weed,
That every word doth almost tell my name,
Showing their birth, and where they did proceed?
O! know sweet love I always write of you,
And you and love are still my argument;…
@… I've been thinking on and off over the past few months if I should sign up (And make my employer pay the membership dues of course).
On one hand I would love to support the concept of professional organizations in our field, seems like there are way too many cowboys just slapping together barely cohesive code and making billions of doll…
I still love how something as totally basic as slowing down sound can reveal textures, harmonics, & microstructures that would otherwise be missed. A fleeting impact unfolds into something spatial, musical, & emotionally resonant. High overtones drop into the audible range, transients dissolve into evolving timbres, & the familiar becomes beautifully uncanny. In slowing sound, we don’t just decelerate it; we uncover its inner architecture - its grain, its buried melodies.
Racked my brain over today’s #tunetuesday #cityaftermidnight until I came up with:
Bad boys inna London
Rude boys inna England
Bad boys inna Jericho
Rude boys inna Kingston
Mentions not one but TWO cities ✅
Talks about stars ✅ Ok Star Wars, but it’s good enou…
A young man and his girlfriend were walking along Main Street when she spotted
a beautiful diamond ring in a jewelry-store window. "Wow, I'd sure love to
have that!" she gushed.
"No problem," her companion replied, throwing a brick through the
window and grabbing the ring.
A few blocks later, the woman admired a full-length sable coat. "What
I'd give to own that," she said, sighing.
"No problem," he said,…
@… I really would love to try it.
Our family is fairly tied in to Apple services, unfortunately, so I can’t switch any time soon. We use iCloud for our shared documents, Apple Music for playing whatever random thing the kid wants to hear today, and we actually quite like Apple Fitness.
I love paying to run my clothes in the dryer for 7 hours and then hanging them up in the spare room because they're still not dry. Such a win for the environment AND my time.
Seriously that text goes so hard, I love it:
"[My new license] is not following the OSI definition of open-source because i don’t give a damn how capital defines its needs."
https://tldr.nettime.org/@tante/115230422460611013
Dear #WordPress people,
If you are publishing Events or already know about or use #GatherPress, I’d like to hear your opinions.
I'm looking for feedback on a new block and would absolutely love, if you could take the time to open this in Playground, experiment with the new "Event Qu…
Just watched #MagnumPI S1E7, "Never Again, Never Again" & from Vietnam to WWII, I'd forgotten how intense the scripts could be.
But I hated S1's "jazz" opening music. It was canned in S2 for the theme we all know & love, but you can hear the dread original here:
"I love acting. It is so much more real than life."
-Oscar Wilde
#acting #coaching #inspiration
As a former Rubyist and admirer of many people in that community… holy shit. Ruby Central power-play land grab over Ruby Gems (maybe for good reasons but nobody knows) and DHH writing love letters to Tommy Robinson.
Tough to know what to link to, I think some people are hiding truths. Anyhow, https://www.
Have y'all who are into anime seen Kinnikuman Perfect Origin Arc on Netflix? Kinda reminds me of Dragonball, but with more wrestling - and I'm not really into either of those things, but I love Kinnikuman. Go figure. It's based on the manga by Yudetamago (ゆでたまご) and some of the character designs were used by Bandai and then Mattel for the M.U.S.C.L.E. figures in the 80s. As they say, boosts appreciated for reach. I'm super curious.
@… I love hangaburrs, maybe too much
My pet peeve in @…: I often want to save attachments, but then also look at them. I’d love to have an accessible way to open the attachment I just saved, like in #Firefox’s download menu or the popup Element offers. Currently, I need to navigate the whole path tw…
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #VarietyMix
Spiritualized:
🎵 I Think I'm in Love
#Spiritualized
https://spiritualizedband.bandcamp.com/track/i-think-im-in-love
https://open.spotify.com/track/4QvdgQSQnOUza57BmPK4fZ
> Due to claims that the Tribulation begins shortly after the Feast of the Trumpets, devoted Christians are urging each other to sell all their personal belongings.
I love this bit. Per Mark 10 you believe you need to sell your possessions to enter the kingdom of god, but ideally you don't have do it until the absolute last minute.
Tyler Booker: I Just Love Playing Football | Dallas Cowboys 2025 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ePyf1jT6jM
I use the fantastic pasteboard manager for my Mac, Pastebot, by @…. I don’t think it’s actively developed at this point, just keeps up with security patches and OS updates.
A feature I’d love to see them add is an option to strip all tracking parameters (or the entire query string) from urls when pasting.
Maybe they don’t want to do this. Maybe there…
I spent more hours than I care to admit trying to get this cyan EDR color (not sure if it will come through) from macOS 26 finder in SwiftUI.
I don’t think it is possible to do that with SwiftUI without using Metal?
Would love any pointers to how to get this. My photocopying won’t be complete without it.
Also, that black, I have struggled to get that black/opacity right.
Today's ride to work... I had to stop and adjust my DIY pannier bag and it's not great. (I forgot to attach the bungee that also locks in the hooks.) I may look at getting some Ortleibs since everyone seems to love those.
#biking #bikeTooter
"So this isn't something that goes away," she continued. "I don't love Donald Trump just in the political sense. I love Donald Trump as a human being. But I cannot stand down on this. I can't. And I think that's the way a lot of MAGA feels."
'Can't fit it in my brain': MAGA hosts implode as Trump calls them 'bad people' - Raw Story
https://www.rawstory.com/maga-epstein-bad-people/
tyler the creator sampling cherry bomb on the second last track of the new album is just a different level of petty lmao i love this guy
I love to publicize journals quantifying dextrogyrous chiral frameworks.
I mean I would love to use lyft instead of uber, but lyft requires installing an app while uber works via website so... 🤷♂️
The Gloves Are Off | "I Absolutely Love That Colbert Got Fired" | Trump & Epstein's Wonderful Secret #uspol
love how every time I get asked for a bio I enter a catatonic state of existential horror as I gaze into the abyss and wonder what I can salvage from my years squandered pinballing between projects never completing anything
so my last bio is job title 2006 person of the year
So final verdict on #sourdough #rye #bread experiment:
I think we nailed the mixture, it rose and came out properly - but it's what I was concerned about: the strong flavors of the sourdough component don't necessarily enhance the rye
If anything, they fight a bit in the flavor - I can taste the sourdough and as a result the rye seems less intense as a rye (and I _love_ a strong rye)
How popular media gets love wrong
Now a bit of background about why I have this "engineered" model of love:
First, I'm a white straight cis man. I've got a few traits that might work against my relationship chances (e.g., neurodivergence; I generally fit pretty well into the "weird geek" stereotype), but as I was recently reminded, it's possible my experience derives more from luck than other factors, and since things are tilted more in my favor than most people on the planet, my advice could be worse than useless if it leads people towards strategies that would only have worked for someone like me. I don't *think* that's the case, but it's worth mentioning explicitly.
When I first started dating my now-wife, we were both in graduate school. I was 26, and had exactly zero dating/romantic experience though that point in my life. In other words, a pretty stereotypical "incel" although I definitely didn't subscribe to incel ideology at all. I felt lonely, and vaguely wanted a romantic relationship (I'm neither aromantic nor asexual), but had never felt socially comfortable enough to pursue one before. I don't drink and dislike most social gatherings like parties or bars; I mostly hung around the fringes of the few college parties I attended, and although I had a reasonable college social life in terms of friends, I didn't really do anything to pursue romance, feeling too awkward to know where to start. I had the beginnings of crushes in both high school and college, but never developed a really strong crush, probably correlated with not putting myself in many social situations outside of close all-male friend gatherings. I never felt remotely comfortable enough to act on any of the proto-crushes I did have. I did watch porn and masturbate, so one motivation for pursuing a relationship was physical intimacy, but loneliness was as much of a motivating factor, and of course the social pressure to date was a factor too, even though I'm quite contrarian.
When I first started dating my now-wife, we were both in graduate school. I was 26, and had exactly zero dating/romantic experience though that point in my life. In other words, a pretty stereotypical "incel" although I definitely didn't subscribe to incel ideology at all. I felt lonely, and vaguely wanted a romantic relationship (I'm neither aromantic nor asexual), but had never felt socially comfortable enough to pursue one before. I don't drink and dislike most social gatherings like parties or bars; I mostly hung around the fringes of the few college parties I attended, and although I had a reasonable college social life in terms of friends, I didn't really do anything to pursue romance, feeling too awkward to know where to start. I had the beginnings of crushes in both high school and college, but never developed a really strong crush, probably correlated with not putting myself in many social situations outside of close all-male friend gatherings. I never felt remotely comfortable enough to act on any of the proto-crushes I did have. I did watch porn and masturbate, so one motivation for pursuing a relationship was physical intimacy, but loneliness was as much of a motivating factor, and of course the social pressure to date was a factor too, even though I'm quite contrarian.
I'm lucky in that I had some mixed-gender social circles already like intramural soccer and a graduate-student housing potluck. Graduate school makes a *lot* more of these social spaces accessible, so I recognize that those not in school of some sort have a harder time of things, especially if like me they don't feel like they fit in in typical adult social spaces like bars.
However, at one point I just decided that my desire for a relationship would need action on my part and so I'd try to build a relationship and see what happened. I worked up my courage and asked one of the people in my potluck if she'd like to go for a hike (pretty much clearly a date but not explicitly one; in retrospect not the best first-date modality in a lot of ways, but it made a little more sense in our setting where we could go for a hike from our front door). To emphasize this point: I was not in love with (or even infatuated with) my now-wife at that point. I made a decision to be open to building a relationship, but didn't follow the typical romance story formula beyond that. Now of course, in real life as opposed to popular media, this isn't anything special. People ask each other out all the time just because they're lonely, and some of those relationships turn out fine (although many do not).
I was lucky in that some aspects of who I am and what I do happened to be naturally comforting to my wife (natural advantage in the "appeal" model of love) but of course there are some aspects of me that annoy my wife, and we negotiate that. In the other direction, there's some things I instantly liked about my wife, and other things that still annoy me. We've figured out how to accept a little, change a little, and overall be happy with each other (though we do still have arguments; it's not like the operation/construction/maintenance of the "love mechanism" is always perfectly smooth). In particular though, I approached the relationship with the attitude of "I want to try to build a relationship with this person," at first just because of my own desires for *any* relationship, and then gradually more and more through my desire to build *this specific* relationship as I enjoyed the rewards of companionship.
So for example, while I think my wife is objectively beautiful, she's also *subjectively* very beautiful *to me* because having decided to build a relationship with her, I actively tried to see her as beautiful, rather than trying to judge whether I wanted a relationship with her based on her beauty. In other words, our relationship is more causative of her beauty-to-me than her beauty-to-me is causative of our relationship. This is the biggest way I think the "engineered" model of love differs from the "fire" and "appeal" models: you can just decide to build love independent of factors we typically think of as engendering love (NOT independent of your partner's willingness to participate, of course), and then all of those things like "thinking your partner is beautiful" can be a result of the relationship you're building. For sure those factors might affect who is willing to try building a relationship with you in the first place, but if more people were willing to jump into relationship building (not necessarily with full commitment from the start) without worrying about those other factors, they might find that those factors can come out of the relationship instead of being prerequisites for it. I think this is the biggest failure of the "appeal" model in particular: yes you *do* need to do things that appeal to your partner, but it's not just "make myself lovable" it's also: is your partner putting in the effort to see the ways that you are beautiful/lovable/etc., or are they just expecting you to become exactly some perfect person they've imagined (and/or been told to desire by society)? The former is perfectly possible, and no less satisfying than the latter.
To cut off my rambling a bit here, I'll just add that in our progress from dating through marriage through staying-married, my wife and I have both talked at times explicitly about commitment, and especially when deciding to get married, I told her that I knew I couldn't live up to the perfect model of a husband that I'd want to be, but that if she wanted to deepen our commitment, I was happy to do that, and so we did. I also rearranged my priorities at that point, deciding that I knew I wanted to prioritize this relationship above things like my career or my research interests, and while I've not always been perfect at that in my little decisions, I've been good at holding to that in my big decisions at least. In the end, *once we had built a somewhat-committed relationship*, we had something that we both recognized was worth more than most other things in life, and that let us commit even more, thus getting even more out of it in the long term. Obviously you can't start the first date with an expectation of life-long commitment, and you need to synchronize your increasing commitment to a relationship so that it doesn't become lopsided, which is hard. But if you take the commitment as an active decision and as the *precursor* to things like infatuation, attraction, etc., you can build up to something that's incredibly strong and rewarding.
I'll follow this up with one more post trying to distill some advice from my ramblings.
#relationships #love
#WritersCoffeeClub July 21: What emotions do you avoid writing? Why?
---
Can't say I specifically avoid any emotions. I don't write some because I don't know how to write them.
Like love.
[Social] Allostasis: Or, How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love The Noise
Imran Khan
https://arxiv.org/abs/2508.12791 https://arxiv.org/pdf/2508.12791
Nothing I love more than being woken up by a client 20m before my early alarm goes off for something that they were supposed to have taken care of 2 days ago.
🤬
I Want to Love Linux. It Doesn’t Love Me Back: Post 4 – Wayland Is Growing Up. And Now We Don’t Have a Choice
https://fireborn.mataroa.blog/blog/i-want-to-love-linux-it-doesnt-love-me-back-p…
Now, anyone can quote. I went into preferences and posting defaults.
This is a great feature. I think a "normal Mastodon" should have quote posts.
Abnormality comes with the lack of it!
I love it! It's beautiful!
Btw, you can edit your post and then the interface tells me I can add a quote post to my post but it didn't work in the end.
Now time to fix all the bugs that arrived due to this new feature being introduced...
Poor programmers, …
Considering the news as of late and all the discussions on social media surrounding that, I think it is a good time to remind everyone that hate is not the answer to anything. We need more love and respect in the world. It doesn't matter if it is brotherly love, neighborly love, platonic love, or romantic love. All love is good; there is no bad love. The type of love is totally up to you, just love your neighbor.
Just because someone is being hateful in their action and speech doesn't me…
Patriots RB TreVeyon Henderson ignoring the preseason hype: 'If things come crashing down, I know that love turns into hate' https://www.nfl.com/news/patriots-rb-treveyon-henderson-ignoring-th…
@… I just had a look at your various site links and just want to say I love everything about them <3
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on #BBC6Music's #NewMusicFix
Tyler Ballgame:
🎵 I Believe in Love
#TylerBallgame
#newRelease 🆕 single
https://tylerballgame.bandcamp.com/track/i-believe-in-love
https://open.spotify.com/track/5Jsks3IWyaeFVEjmVtw2H3
I love the non-profit block of the Art Fair, I love to go and argue with the anti-tax people and the Mars society dweebs, to glare at the Republicans, to donate to Planned Parenthood and some of the off-brand religions, to smile and wave and loudly greet the communists HI COMMUNISTS!!! They always wave back. It is such a welcoming feeling!
I’ve been twice already today, once with four grandchildren who collected tons of swag and were cute as hell.
I am loving Buffy the vamp. slayer btw.
Love to see Supernatural's roots :P
Sonnet 062 - LXII
Sin of self-love possesseth all mine eye
And all my soul, and all my every part;
And for this sin there is no remedy,
It is so grounded inward in my heart.
Methinks no face so gracious is as mine,
No shape so true, no truth of such account;
And for myself mine own worth do define,
As I all other in all worths surmount.
But when my glass shows me myself indeed
Beated and chopp'd with tanned antiquity,
Mine…
i saw a toot joking about “liquid ass” and it’s all i can think of when i read about apple’s new shit
i didn’t know that liquid ass is a stink bomb, i think the original toot was about lube for anal, but it reminds me of diarrhoea
i am sure apple would love it if their new look reminds everyone of different kinds of arse juice
Watching on Roku channel instead of Tubi and love not getting fix commercials but I am getting several panda express commercials in a row.
#nwsl
love being connected to enough programmer type trans women that i have access to 24/7 human tech support 😇
This is beautiful! I plan on backing it tonight.
I love Indian street lettering, I think it’s one of the most unique things about India. https://typo.social/@matratype/114886005516105051
🇺🇦 Auf radioeins läuft...
Sam Taylor-Wood:
🎵 I'm In Love With A German Film Star
#NowPlaying #SamTaylorWood
https://kompakt.bandcamp.com/track/im-in-love-with-a-german-film-star-gui-boratto-remix
https://open.spotify.com/track/3NT7jidpDWSaiZe73A5nRs
This is a trend of my desire to not drink alcohol over the last few days. Purely coincidentally, this is also a graph of the state of charge of my solar battery array over the last few days.
I think I'm like one of those lizards that has to recharge in the sun to have any desire to live. No wonder I love the desert. No wonder I don't love Ireland.
@… @… @… I would love that but unfortunately, everyone* loads scripts from everywhere, and …
I found two different apps for iOS that will export GPX files one at a time, which is nice when you don't want to export *all* of your Apple Health data to get just a few files.
But also, it's fucked up that we cannot just access the data/files in the file system.
Yeah, yeah, I know... Apple, iOS, etc. So much I don't love but it's the lesser of many evils ecosystem for me right now.
🇺🇦 Auf radioeins läuft...
My Morning Jacket:
🎵 I Can Hear Your Love
#NowPlaying #MyMorningJacket
https://mmorningjacket.bandcamp.com/track/i-can-hear-your-love
https://open.spotify.com/track/6irjehaRKilu5g6XmbWF6J
Sonnet 071 - LXXI
No longer mourn for me when I am dead
Than you shall hear the surly sullen bell
Give warning to the world that I am fled
From this vile world with vilest worms to dwell:
Nay, if you read this line, remember not
The hand that writ it, for I love you so,
That I in your sweet thoughts would be forgot,
If thinking on me then should make you woe.
O! if, I say, you look upon this verse,
When I perhaps compounded am with …
My wife, Collette, and I are working on Travel plans for next year. Santa Fe is on the list. Probably mid to late June. Looking at the weather, seems it’s not too hot (highs low 80s). I’m sure it's crowded at that time but we're ok with that.
I’d love a recommendation or two for something not typically on the radar of tourists. I’m specifically tagging @…, b…
i prolly just need some sort of tangible love right now to be honest. we should be able to convert love into slightly pinkish pearls in our mouths by concentrating really hard, so we can give them out.
To continue with my post on examples of how I'm unique/strange/weird/unusual and how I'm proud of that fact (remember weirdo=compliment, normal=insult), here is another way of how I don't fit the male stereotype.
I love to cuddle, hug, and all forms of physical touch. I am, though, keenly aware of consent and make sure to never engage in any sort of touching unless I'm 100% confident the recipient is receptive to it and would consent to it. Touching someone, or even just bursting their p…
God I love Instruments.
And to think that Microsoft killed our awesome Instruments-inspired profiler for C# and people have to use that tasteless and useless profiler on windows.
How popular media gets love wrong
Had some thoughts in response to a post about loneliness on here. As the author emphasized, reassurances from people who got lucky are not terribly comforting to those who didn't, especially when the person who was lucky had structural factors in their favor that made their chances of success much higher than those is their audience. So: these are just my thoughts, and may not have any bearing on your life. I share them because my experience challenged a lot of the things I was taught to believe about love, and I think my current beliefs are both truer and would benefit others seeing companionship.
We're taught in many modern societies from an absurdly young age that love is not something under our control, and that dating should be a process of trying to kindle love with different people until we meet "the one" with whom it takes off. In the slightly-less-fairytale corners of modern popular media, we might fund an admission that it's possible to influence love, feeding & tending the fire in better or worse ways. But it's still modeled as an uncontrollable force of nature, to be occasionally influenced but never tamed. I'll call this the "fire" model of love.
We're also taught (and non-boys are taught more stringently) a second contradictory model of love: that in a relationship, we need to both do things and be things in order to make our partner love us, and that if we don't, our partner's love for us will wither, and (especially if you're not a boy) it will be our fault. I'll call this the "appeal" model of love.
Now obviously both of these cannot be totally true at once, and plenty of popular media centers this contradiction, but there are really very few competing models on offer.
In my experience, however, it's possible to have "pre-meditated" love. In other words, to decide you want to love someone (or at least, try loving them), commit to that idea, and then actually wind up in love with them (and them with you, although obviously this second part is not directly under your control). I'll call this the "engineered" model of love.
Now, I don't think that the "fire" and "appeal" models of love are totally wrong, but I do feel their shortcomings often suggest poor & self-destructive relationship strategies. I do think the "fire" model is a decent model for *infatuation*, which is something a lot of popular media blur into love, and which drives many (but not all) of the feelings we normally associate with love (even as those feelings have other possible drivers too). I definitely experienced strong infatuation early on in my engineered relationship (ugh that sounds terrible but I'll stick with it; I promise no deception was involved). I continue to experience mild infatuation years later that waxes and wanes. It's not a stable foundation for a relationship but it can be a useful component of one (this at least popular media depicts often).
I'll continue these thoughts in a reply, by it might take a bit to get to it.
#relationships
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #Expansions
Private Joy & Fox:
🎵 Pure Love (Mali-I Dub)
#PrivateJoy #Fox
https://privatejoy.bandcamp.com/track/pure-love-ft-fox-mali-i-dub-2
https://open.spotify.com/track/3It2Gi5cw9LdqMMlzNrIg0
Just updated Tvmarks to 3.0 as I finally transition it to typescript.
I avoided typescript before as Postmarks was not and Glitch really struggled with the build step needed for typescript.
Typescript will only make adding new features easier as adding bugs will be harder.
I continue to love Tvmarks and I use it every day!
https://
Sonnet 130 - CXXX
My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red, than her lips red:
If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.
I have seen roses damasked, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks;
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.
I love to hear her speak, yet well I know
That music hath …
🇺🇦 Auf radioeins läuft...
Arcade Fire:
🎵 I Love Her Shadow
#NowPlaying #ArcadeFire
https://open.spotify.com/track/3vzh2kkBjJ6Eq28bznTQoj
I love both Judge Dredd movies and would love another one.
#movies
@… @… Looks interesting, I should check it out!
I really would love to abandon Kubernetes and run into the hills, but everyone wants it… I find it very frustrating.
🇺🇦 Auf radioeins läuft...
Fun Lovin' Criminals:
🎵 I'm Not In Love
#NowPlaying #FunLovinCriminals
https://open.spotify.com/track/0KUmRu8ba2thwC3ExxizwF
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on KEXP's #PositiveVibrations
Jacob Miller:
🎵 Baby I Love You So
#JacobMiller
https://defaultbeats.bandcamp.com/track/8-jacob-miller-baby-i-love-you-so
https://open.spotify.com/track/2iCshqpZ6LQEOaUj7vQEgc